Surgery Day

Wednesday 13th February 2013

I was absolutely exhausted this morning as I had slept terribly, although I'm sure that Mum has had a worse night than me.  I phoned the hospital at 9am and spoke to Lucy who told me that Mum was 4th on the list for surgery today and that they were expecting to take her down to theatre around lunchtime.  She had already been prepped for surgery and was in her gown just in case anything changed.  Lucy told me that Mum was incredibly anxious and that I could come in at any time to be with her.  I told her that we would be there by 10.30am.

Dad and I arrived at the hospital at 10.30am and had the usual trouble parking the car.  There were no spaces in the front car park and the multi-storey was already full with cars queueing down the road to get in.  We couldn't find a 2 hour space on the road as these are like gold dust! Eventually Dad dropped me at the front doors and I headed up to the ward on my own whilst he continued to drive around.  I noticed as I was walking up that I had a missed call on my phone from Mum's mobile.  I tried to call her back but I had no reception and my mind began to race.  I quickened my step and soon arrived to find a trolley bed in the doorway to Mum's room and two theatre staff waiting in their scrubs.  Mum was no where to be seen.  I had a quick panic before she appeared from the toilet and the nurse said to me "Thank God you made it in time, the operation before has been cancelled and they're taking your Mum now." 

I was so relieved that I made it in time as I really was convinced that this would be my final goodbye.  I was allowed to walk down to theatre with Mum holding her hand, but I could hardly talk to her as the old familiar lump had formed in my throat and my eyes were welling up.  I gave her a big kiss and a cuddle and squeezed her hand before telling her that she would be fine and I would see her again in a few hours.  I don't think I believed it.  She looked frightened, but I thought she was being very brave.

I headed back to Mum's room and spoke to Lucy who assured me that they would come and find me when they had any news.  I phoned Dad and told him that Mum had already gone and he wouldn't get to see her now anyway.  He still hadn't found a parking space so he decided to go and wait at home and I would let him know as soon as there was any news.  The operation was expected to take a couple of hours.  Lucy encouraged me to go and get a coffee and something to eat and wait in Mum's room for as long as I wanted.  I went and bought take-away coffee, crisps and jelly babies and quickly made my way back as I wanted to be there, firstly in case anything went wrong and they needed to come and speak to me, and secondly as I didn't want Mum to return to an empty room after such a major ordeal.

It was a long wait but I passed the time by phoning Oli and David, reading my book, knitting, doing word searches and hand-writing the previous blog entry.  I really should have brought my laptop with me and done some work but I didn't think I would be able to concentrate.  I was so nervous, but I think I was ready to hear bad news if it came.  I was grateful that I had the opportunity to say goodbye the previous night.

At 1.10pm two theatre staff returned to the room to collect Mum's bed.  They told me that the operation was over and that they were taking the bed so that they could transfer Mum to recovery.  They couldn't give me any more information than that, but at least I knew she was OK.  She was expected to stay in recovery for a couple of hours and be returned to her room once she had woken up from the anaesthetic.  Dad came back into the hospital at 4pm and Mum was returned to her room at 4.30pm, so we were both there to greet her.  She was very sleepy and not making much sense, but she had survived it!

It became apparent that Mum was in a lot of pain following the operation and it seemed to me that she wasn't being given any additional pain relief on top of the morphine she had already been taking for her existing pain.  The surgeon had made three incisions in Mum's tummy - one for the stoma, and two for the camera and these were obviously painful and very uncomfortable.  She couldn't turn over in the bed or move hardly at all.  When she asked for oral morphine to top up it sometimes took the nurses up to 45 minutes to bring it to her.  I found it very difficult to watch her in pain and the non-urgent response of the nurses was incredibly frustrating.  I asked several times about the PCA machine, but just kept being told that the doctors hadn't made a decision regarding what to do with her yet. 

Eventually a nurse came to speak with us and told us that Dr Farouk who had performed the operation would be doing a ward round usually between 7-8pm and that if we wanted to speak to him we would be able to catch him then.  Dad and I decided that we would go and get something to eat before then so that we would be back in time to speak to the surgeon.  It turns out he did his ward round 20 minutes after we left!  He was kind enough to phone Dad's mobile and left a message telling him that the operation had been a success with no complications, which was a comfort to hear.

We returned to the hospital after dinner and spent a further couple of hours with Mum before we left for the night.  She still had not been given a PCA machine and by that time of night I didn't expect she would get one.  We went home at 9.30pm and again, I felt so sad to leave her alone that night, but this time I knew she would still be with us in the morning.